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| How to find your soul mate in love |
And there’s a great chance that they’re
right around the corner and looking for love too. And you need to really
understand this, figuring out how to find your soul mate isn’t as hard as many
portray it to be.
It really isn’t as hard as finding a
needle in a haystack. As a matter of fact, it’s as simple as taking a walk in
the park. Hopefully, a short walk!
What is a soul mate?
Everyone talks about soul mates, but does
anyone even know what it means these days? You may be in search of one, but do
you know the exact old-school meaning of a soul mate? Well, there are two
meanings and no one living can ever tell you which one is true, or even if
either of them is true.
1. Two souls as one
According to one definition, a partner pair of souls are separated in the spiritual world and manifest
themselves in two different human bodies. And both these humans end up
searching for their partner their whole lives, and can’t find peace until they
find each other and fall in love with each other, thus uniting once again.
2. One soul as two
Now the other mythical definition is that
one soul is split into two, and these two halves manifest themselves in two
human forms on Earth. And both of these halves can’t find peace or love until they
unite as one again.
No one really knows if either of these
definitions is true, or if it’s just a story to give more value to a couple in
love. But nevertheless, it’s a beautiful thought.
The real definition of a soul mate
Do we believe in soul mates? Of course, we
do! But here’s something you need to know. You may search high and low for that
perfect lover, but you have to understand this fact if you want to know how to
find your soul mate.
According to us, here’s the real
definition of a soul mate – Soul mates aren’t born, they’re made. Soul
mates are created with love and compromise, and they’re given shape by two
great lovers who understand, respect, and cherish each other.
If you find yourselves falling more in
love with each other with each passing day, and if either of you does your best
in your own little ways to make each other feel better and more loved, you’re
on your way to becoming soul mates.
After all, two incompatible
people can never become soul mates. It requires more than love and
attraction, it requires unconditional love and the will to compromise
for each other’s happiness to truly become soul mates.
The right approach to finding your soul mate
You don’t want to give up on your search for a soul
mate or settle for someone you know is not quite right. But it feels as though
your search might go on forever. What if you and your soul mate never find one
another? Does a life of loneliness await?
The truth is, none of us should settle for a person we
know isn’t good enough for us, who doesn’t treat us right, or is simply
incompatible with us. There is someone out there for everyone. So, have faith, and don’t give up on your search!
How to find your soul mate
You can sit back and wait for love to find you, and it
may never really happen. At times, it takes a bit of an adventure to meet the
one who can take your breath away.
If you really do want to know how to find your soul
mate, start taking chances in love. The sooner you start to take the initiative
to find that elusive soul mate, the sooner you’d find your knight or damsel.
Confused about the way forward? Here’s everything you
can change in your life, and we assure you, you’ll meet your soul mate sooner
than you can imagine. And the happy journey to finding your soul mate would be
an experience of a lifetime too!
Be yourself (but actually).
The whole
point of a soul mate is that they're someone who is meant to love you for you,
so how are you supposed to find them if you’re not being yourself? Relationship
expert Jasbina Ahluwalia, founder of Intersections Match by Jasbina,
advises: “Be you unabashedly. Own who you are. If you're not proud of any part
of you, empower yourself to improve that part. If you love you, your soul mate
will as well.”
Look into the mirror. Are you happy with
what you see? If you want to find your perfect soul mate, you need to take
steps to be perfect too. After all, all of us wear rather tinted glasses that
make us shallow at first sight. It’s always easier to get the attention of soul
mate potential when you look your best and feel confident about it.
There’s a perfect ‘you’ waiting to be
chiseled out inside your body. Bring that attractive looker out and you’ll see
your confidence soar through the roof. And when you’re confident and happy with
your appearance, it shows.
Be totally comfortable with yourself
Before you
can find your soul mate, make peace with yourself. If you go into a new
relationship full of fear or self-loathing and are unable to love yourself, it is
going to be tough for your soul mate to connect with you the way they should.
Don’t seek perfection.
If you keep a strict vision in your head
of what your soul mate should be like, you’ll probably miss out on the person
you’re meant to be with. “Your soul mate is usually not who you’ve envisioned,
but an entity of love that co-opts a body that mirrors all of your
imperfections in a way that makes you love yourself more,” says Frenchie
Davis, “You’ll find your soul mate in what you consider your flaws. It will be
the person that admires what you’re afraid to love about yourself.”
Take it slow
"When it comes to finding your soul
mate, remember that you can't rush things," says dating and relationship
expert Laura Bilotta. "It may take a while, but when the timing is
right, everything will align,” she says.
If you're, like, the most impatient person
ever though (hi, it's me): “Be patient and stay positive. Take some time to work
on yourself, and think about what you're looking for and what will make you happy.
And if the search for 'the one' is getting exhausting, don't be afraid to take
a step back until you're ready to get back into the dating game so that you can
put yourself fully into it. You need to enjoy the ride and trust that your soul
mate will come along when you're ready for them."
Figure yourself out.
I don't know who needs to hear this, but
finding your soul mate is not as easy. Dating coach Stef Safran advises
you "invest in all parts of your life." This can look like actively
engaging in self-care, working out, investing in your interests personally,
etc. This way, you can learn more about yourself to find the type of person who
would fit best for you.
When you put yourself out there, remember
"It's okay to have a series of bad dates, no dates, or even take a
dating hiatus,” Safran says. “It's okay to ask for advice and it's also okay
not to accept all the advice you receive. Everyone needs to understand that
failure is part of how you succeed and that there is nothing wrong with being
single and looking.”
Don’t settle
Sure, it’s important to be understanding
and accepting of other people's flaws, but a soul mate is supposed to be your
~epic love~, meaning you can't rush or force this kind of feeling on any
random person you match with on Tinder.
Licensed marriage and family therapist Moe
A. Brown says: “I encourage anyone who wants to meet their soul mate to do one
simple thing: Stand in the mirror and get to know who you are intimate. Who
you are in your highest form is the exact energy signature you are looking for.
"
Look for someone who accepts you for who
you are.
You can put the effort in from your end, but
if the other person doesn’t reciprocate, not much can be achieved. “Find
someone who honors and accepts you as you are, strives to understand you and
your perspective and feelings, and is willing to work through your differences
with respect and compromise,” says relationship expert and author of First
Comes Us: The Busy Couple's Guide to Lasting Love Anita Chlipala.
“Find someone with a commitment to
commitment and who is willing to do the work to make the relationship work. A
soul mate relationship doesn’t just magically exist–it is intentionally
created,” she says.
Put in the work.
And finally, once you've actually put in
the work toward finding your soul mate, it's time to put effort into
maintaining that relationship. “Relationships thrive when you invest in
understanding one another’s needs, while also acknowledging that one person
cannot fulfill all of your needs—physically, socially, practically, says Jess O’Reilly, Ph.D.
“Becoming soul mates involves open
communication that is ongoing and minimizes judgment. You don’t have to have
everything in common to become soul mates, but if you’re both willing to put in
a similar amount of effort (time, communication, broadening of comfort zones)
to make it work, you might find that this facilitates the process of becoming
soul mates.”
Try new experiences
Are you having a hard time finding someone
who excites you? Are you looking in all the right places? Are you even looking
outside your own little world?
Most of us like the comfort of our own
little world. We don’t like to try new things or meet new people. But if you do
want to find your soul mate, you need to step out into the big world and
experience new things. If your friends invite you to a whitewater raft or trek a
hill, don’t back out. Try new things, explore possibilities, and live your life
to the fullest. And almost always, you’d end up meeting the love of your life
at a new experience, when you least expect it.
The best part of all this is that you
don’t really need to put a hold on your life while searching for love. Instead,
you can live your life to the fullest. Life has a great way of throwing happy
surprises when you least expect it.
Have the big conversations as early as
possible
Marriage? Kids? Traveling? Settling down?
Pets? You don’t have to ask the person you just met to move in with you after
the first date, but trying to establish where they stand on the big things
early on saves getting too far down the road and ending up disappointed.
Write down the things you look for in your ideal partner
Really spend some time thinking about what you
want from a soul mate. Write these qualities down and reflect on them when you
meet someone with potential.
Know your faults
Remember you are not perfect. Your soul
mate will accept your flaws, but also you need to be willing to work on
yourself too.
Make the effort
Your soul mate
is unlikely to just fall into your lap. So be sure you take your search
seriously. Get out there and actually try to find them.
Search in the
right places
There are some
places where you are more likely to meet like-minded people compatible with
you. Go to these places, make conversation, and see where it takes you.
Be willing to change your mind
Now that you
do have a list of specific things you want in a partner, keep those points in
mind but be willing to bend the requirements a wee bit now and then.
Always be
willing to compromise. As you grow and evolve as a person, your idea of the
perfect soul mate would change too. Don’t ever be rigid when you’re looking for
love, with the ideals of who you were five years ago. Just go with the flow and
listen to what your heart tells you.
Don’t turn down opportunities
Is a good friend of yours trying to fix
you up on a blind date? Don’t brush the thought away. Whether it’s about dating
someone new or meeting a new group of friends, don’t turn down opportunities to
interact.
To understand how to find your soul mate,
you need to keep your eyes open. Love is mysterious, and it’s completely
unpredictable. And that’s what makes finding your soul mate so magical and
exciting!
Know the warning signs that things aren’t going well
If you are serious about finding a soul
mate, let relationships go that aren’t working. It is easy to be blinded by the
passion and excitement of a new relationship. Instead, try to be aware of the
warning signs that things aren’t quite what they seem so you don’t waste
valuable time.
Pay attention to chemistry
Chemistry and spark are important in any
relationship, especially if you’re trying to figure out how to find your soul
mate. Do you feel chemistry with this person?
Now that you’re in the dating scene and
waiting to find that special someone who you can call your soul mate, keep an
eye on the spark. You may meet a great guy or a girl who may be perfect, but
sometimes, love is a funny thing.
It can bring two great people together,
and yet, both of them may feel no excitement toward each other. Always look
for chemistry and attraction in a relationship. Do you feel excited to be with
the person you’re dating?
If you can’t feel electricity surge
through your spine when your date runs their hand on your back, or don’t feel
blissfully weak after a first kiss, well, perhaps, you’re missing out on a bit
of that all-important chemistry that soul mates have.
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